05 January 2012

Engaged Now What? When? Where? Who? Why? and How

 Now that excitement of the holidays is wearing down, you might have a little more time to start thinking about the when, what, where, who, why and how's of planning your wedding. 
This is the beginning planning stage and where all the fun begins! 


How many times where your asked this question in the last few weeks, “Sooo when are you two getting married?” Do you have a date in mind?  It’s one of the most important days in your life so take time when picking a date to tie the knot. But where do you begin, shouldn’t be too difficult right? Most couples tend to choose a wedding date to symbolize some personal event like the anniversary date of your first date or the first kiss.  A season (don’t you just love the thought of a Winter Wonderland themed wedding day? I really DO). The Weather is another factor, even in sunny California some months are better suited for a romantic beach wedding than others. Another factor could be your budget, having a wedding on Friday and Sunday, earlier in the day or during the off wedding season months could save you some money on the ceremony and reception venue.

This is where you need that wedding planner/binder we talked about last week to keep your pictures and ideas that inspire your wedding day vision. To start this you and your honey will need to get  some paper and start brainstorming about what your dream wedding looks like and how you are going to really BRING IT when it comes to incorporating your personality and style into the wedding day.  What words describe your wedding is it classic and elegant, rustic, vintage, modern, fairytale like, chic and simple, formal or casual? Do you want a themed wedding day or a traditional wedding or a mixture of the two? Would you like to include other cultural celebrations and traditions? What colors are the bridesmaids’ dresses? What flowers are in your centerpieces, in your bouquet? What do you want your guest experience to be when it comes to the food, drinks, entertainment the atmosphere and yeah the PARTY!  (I love planning these types of weddings CALL ME if your wedding is all about the WOW and Party I have some amazing ideas for you) the point is to be as detailed as possible, then use what you come up with to design a wedding day that you will love.


Who will be attending your wedding? And how many guests will be attending? Do you want to invite kids? The guest list can be a painful task but is one that has to be done. There are co-workers, friends of parents, grandparents, neighbors, childhood friends, more friends and family from out of town from both sides of the family. How do you decide who to invite? Take a piece of paper fold it down the middle and give half to your honey.  Fold the paper in halves again and label the columns A and B. The A column is for immediate family, friends you hang with often or been to their wedding recently and co-workers. In the B column put family members that you really don’t speak to or haven't seen in over 12 months, other co-workers, childhood friends, (don’t worry no -one will ever know that they were on the B list!) If parents are paying for the wedding they may want to invite some of their friends, in that case split 
the list in 1/3 for parents to invite some guest.


Now that you have the who, what and when details you need to figure out how you will bring all of these details together and find a venue for your wedding day. Where do you want to get married? Do you want to ceremony at a local location? Or get married at some tropical destination around the world, the possibilities are endless; from a traditional synagogue or church, indoor at a hotel banquet room or outdoor garden, or mountain top wedding a private residence or even some where funky and modern like an art museum or barn. A good resource is gatheringguide.com, you can search by location or type of venue.


Having a set wedding day budget is very important whether you’re working with a million dollar budget or five thousand dollars, you need a budget.  It is so easy for all of the wedding pretty stuff to run rapidly out of control.  We talk more about the “B” word (budget) next week but until then here is some questions to consider. How are you going to pay for wedding day expenses? Will you be receiving a little help from your parents or are family members contributing, money or baking a cake.  Are you using credit cards, taking out a loan, using your savings? You can make use of your  “Who”,” What” and “Where” list to come up with what details or elements you must have for your wedding day, like a large venue to hold 300 guest, or travel arrangements for a destination wedding. To get an estimate of what it may it may cost and then you can Google to find out how much the cost would be or save some time and sign up for a consultation with a wedding planner who knows firsthand about how much your wedding day will cost. 


This is an easy one. Of course we know why you’re getting married; you found the love of your life, your best friend. But it is so easy to get caught up in all the planning that you forget why all this is happening in the first place. Although it might be hard to step away from the excitement of planning your wedding day, be sure to take some time out and just be, go out on dates and keep it sexy…that means NO WEDDING TALK!  Just relax, have fun and enjoy each other company.